We all have our own particular way of doing things, but there’s a fine line between being particular and being controlling. If you’re a controlling person, it’s likely you’re sabotaging your own relationships. What’s even worse is that being a controlling person can take a toll on your partner’s self-esteem. It can weaken your trust and interfere with communication. All these elements are essential for a healthy relationship.
When I worked with couples as a Domestic Violence Victim Advocate and Planned Parenthood Certified Responsible Sexuality Educator, control issues were at the heart of most of the failing relationships. What’s sadder is that control was also a big part of the abusive relationships.
Remember, relationships should only enhance your life. They should never take away your identity, or your independence. And as a loving, supportive partner, you should never want to take away your love’s sense of self and sense of control over their own lives. This is not an exhaustive list, but if you’re doing any of these controlling behaviors in your relationship, it’s likely that if you don’t loosen up the reigns, your love story could be over without any kind of happy ending.
